Monday, August 18, 2014

Waiting On The Lord

When i got married, i wanted to have 4-6 kids and even prepared myself to be pregnant every two years  there after...but God had other plans, not what i want but what He wants.

My first born was a boy but had a miscarriage on my 7th month...but got pregnant again in 3 months after, then TJ came. I had enjoyed my time with him. Being a mom of an only child tends me to focus on him more, but seeing him not having to enjoy the blessing of a siblings broke my heart often...so i prayed hard to God to grant my heart's desire of another child...God answered my prayer after 6 long years, Alex! TJ was so joyful and excited when she came, he even named her Alex for he thought she was a boy but later found out thru ultrasound that its a baby girl, nevertheless, that doesn't stop him calling her Alex - Alexandra in full :-) He love her to death. Took care of her. Protect her. Think of her.

Present day: it's been awhile that my children are asking and praying for another sister/brother to come along again...beside, it's been 6 years again that had passed. they are both ready to welcome another member of the family. the truth is, i am pressured not only because i also wanted to have a baby again, the joy and everything that surrounds in it, but more so because i'm not getting any younger, at 37, im already in a high risk stage of being pregnant...so we keep on trying...

...and got frustrated often...then i heard Pastor Perter Tan-chi yesterday in his sunday talked mentioning that God answers praying in His time, don't pressure yourself of having and wanting a child, just enjoy sex, and if God will give you one, then be joyful, if He will not, then be more joyful for everything is in His time.

This morning, my time to check again if i'm pregnant...
Psalm 27:14 says, Wait patiently for the Lord. Be brave and courageous. Yes, wait patiently for the Lord.

i cried silently while Han is embracing me. My initial reaction is to ask God why, but was reminded of the verse above.

Waiting for God is not easy. Often it seems that he isn't answering our prayers or doesn't understand the urgency of our situation. That kind of thinking implies that God is not in control or is not fair. But God is worth waiting for. Lamentation 3:24-26 calls us to hope in and wait for the Lord because often God uses times of waiting to refresh, renew, and teach us.

Make good use of your waiting times by discovering what God may be trying to teach you in them and waiting means confident expectation :-)

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